Teenagers are one off the most misunderstood people. They are treated like children and expected to act like adults.
Being a teen can be like riding a roller coaster, joyful highs that quickly plunge into dramatic lows, with unexpected twists and turns. Between difficult peer relationships, school pressure, mood fluctuations, and solidifying a sense of self (identity), keeping yourself on the track can be exhausting.
Middle and high school are already filled with stressful expected changes, which makes the unexpected ones even harder to cope with, like divorce, loss of a loved one, moving, and breakups. All these changes force adaptation, which can be hard when you feel alone, unheard, or misunderstood.
Having a safe space for a nonjudgmental dump of frustrations, worries, fears, pressures, and expectations can be the relief and release you need to slow things down and figure out what to do next.
Parenting a teen can feel just as daunting. As these young adults traverse the unknown so do you along side them, trying to figure out ways to connect and create some type of common language.
As their lives change, finding common ground becomes more difficult and challenges your relationship with them. This tension can lead to frustration, anger, miscommunication, and arguments.
Our role on this journey with your family, is to help identify these breakdowns in communication and connection and create a new understanding and a plan for the people you are today.
Common feelings from Teens
self doubt, self comparison, negative thinking, lack of self worth or self confidence, self harm, over or under eating "why am I like this?", "I'm not good enough?"
difficulty making or keeping friends, hopelessness, isolation, feeling misunderstood or unheard "no one understands", "I don't have the energy", "nothing will change"
overthinking, fear, anxiousness, difficulty doing daily activities, feeling unsafe, anxiety, paralyzed, avoidance, sweating, fast heart rate, shaking, hiding "I can't stop thinking about it", "but what if..."
despair, lack of energy, heavy feeling, dark thoughts "It will never be the same", "I can't let go"
numb, lack of feeling, acting out, disregard for others feelings or rules, lack of responsibility and accountability, argumentative, risky behavior "I don't feel anything", "who cares", "you don't understand"
feeling lost, identity crisis, feeling out of place, misunderstood, stress, difficulty with boundaries "I don't belong", "I don't know what I want to do in my future"
panic, overthinking, anxiousness, heavy expectations, over or under preparing, avoidance, nervous ticks (picking, tapping leg, nail biting), paralyzed, over or under sleeping or eating, feeling out of control, stuck, hopeless, isolating "Its too much", "I can't take it anymore", "I can't stop thinking about it", "but what if"
frustration, argumentative, defensive, irritated, feeling out of control, lack of control, guilt, disappointment "I can't control it"
procrastination, lack of energy, feeling stuck "I don't have the energy", "It's hard to motivate myself to do things that I don't like"
Common feelings from parents
guilty, confused, disconnected, frustrated, overwhelmed, worried, unappreciated, discouraged, stressed
Teenage years come with unique developmental challenges that can leave parents feeling:
"what did I do wrong?" "I don't know what else to do?" "how do I help them?"
Repairing your relationship with your teen and/or finding ways to help them with their struggles can be hard to do alone; something is not quite working and has lead you here. Take a deep breath, because you made it; together we will identify the needs of your teen, develop tools and skills to help them cope, provide a safe space for their thoughts and feelings to be heard and validated, and give you strategies to better support them.
The struggle is real. You don't have to do it alone.